child holding flowers, mommy & daughter looking at each other with so much love in their eyes - mom lessons

4 Important Mom Lessons Every Mom Must Know

With my oldest child saying goodbye to toddlerhood, I can’t help but feel very emotional. I’ve asked myself countless of times… where did those 4 precious years go? I cannot, for the life of me, believe she just turned 4 when I seriously feel like I’ve just given birth to her yesterday. It may sound like a cliché but that is exactly how I feel right now. I never believed people when they say that kids do grow up too fast; now I do! To celebrate the 4 AMAZING years my daughter has given me, I want to share with you 4 important mom lessons I learned after being a mom for 4 years, which every mom must know.

Mom Lesson #1: Learn To Forgive Yourself

mom is sad, probably frustrated with what she did or failed to do while her daughter is hugging her - mom lessons

Mommy trying to get herself together after failing as a mom while her daughter is hugging her – one of the mom lessons every mom must learn

This is probably the most important mom lesson that you have to learn. You must realize that there is no such thing as a perfect mom. You’re going to make mistakes, tons and tons of them; bad days with your child are inevitable; your patience is going to be tested ALL THE TIME; your child is going to get hurt just because you turned around for a few seconds. With all the craziness and chaos that come with motherhood, despite your best efforts, you must remember to forgive yourself every single day; and strive to be better the next day.

With all the craziness and chaos that come with motherhood, despite your best efforts, you must remember to forgive yourself every single day; and strive to be better the next day. - mom lessons

It took me a while to realize this. I’ve always blamed and criticized myself for things I’ve done and I failed to do. I was always hard on myself because I had a “high standard” of what I should be as a mom; and it was a horrible feeling. It’s like I’m carrying a heavy weight with me every single day. Realizing what my mistakes were and what I failed to do, and not blaming myself for everything is a very liberating feeling. And coming to terms with this mom lesson was one of the best things I did for myself as a mom.




Mom Lesson #2: You Are The Best In Their Eyes

child holding flowers, mommy & daughter looking at each other with so much love in their eyes - mom lessons

Mommy & daughter looking at each other with so much love in their eyes, while daughter is holding flowers behind her – one of the mom lessons every mom must learn

Yes, there is no such thing as a perfect mom; but you must know this second mom lesson. In the eyes of your child, you are perfect. You are their role model. Don’t feel bad if you can’t come up with crafts to do every week, if you can’t bake a cupcake, let alone decorate one, if dishes keep piling up at the sink, or if you have 4 weeks worth of unsorted and unfolded laundry. You don’t have to be a Pinterest perfect mom; because they don’t exist. If they do, there’s probably a handful of them. And even so, you shouldn’t feel bad about yourself because of what you cannot do.

In the eyes of your child, everything that you do, perfect or not, is done with love. And for them, that is enough. And that is what makes you the best in their eyes. - mom lessons

Just focus on the one thing that you (and only you can) do the best and embrace it; and that is raising your child with so much love. You need to know that your child greatly appreciates all the effort that you put in everything you do for them. In the eyes of your child, everything that you do, perfect or not, is done with love. And for them, that is enough. And that is what makes you the best in their eyes.

Mom Lesson #3: You Will Wing It

mom multitasking, working while the kids are watching - mom lessons

Mommy winging it at motherhood; she’s working while taking care of the kids – one of the mom lessons every mom must learn

Just like any first time mom, I don’t know anything about babies, taking care of them, let alone raising kids. When we were expecting our first baby, I was so scared because I didn’t know how to be a mom. I’ve always doubted my capabilities to take care of someone other than myself because I’ve never done that before.

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To prepare myself for my daughter’s arrival, I read every article and every book I could about what to expect the first year, or how to have the happiest baby on the block, and other things. I’ve had countless conversations with my mom and friends about motherhood and everything that comes with it. But to be honest, when I gave birth to my daughter 4 years ago, I didn’t know what to do. I was lost! It’s as if all the books and articles I read, and all the conversations I had, didn’t happen. It felt like I didn’t prepare for her arrival. All I knew was that I have to protect her from that moment on.

And then shortly after my daughter was born, I found out we were expecting another baby. I was still adjusting to my new role as a mom and slowly trying to keep myself from drowning from all the responsibilities. And there I was, about to be have a second baby. I got scared again! I wasn’t sure if I’ll be able to love my second born as much as I love my daughter; AGAIN, I doubted my capability. But this time, it’s about taking care of 2 babies under 2 years old. Much worse, I was worried how in the world are we going to afford daycare for 2 kids.

Trust in yourself & that the love that you have for your little one will help you wing it! - mom lessons

But you know what? Caring for my kids came naturally to me. It’s as if someone was whispering what I should and should not do. Sure, I’ve made some mistakes and we’ve faced a lot of challenges as a family, but for the past 4 years, I’ve been winging it. That’s not to say that you should not prepare for the arrival of your precious little one. Prepare as much as you can and don’t be scared. Whatever happens and whatever it is you’re struggling with, just keep this mom lesson in mind all the time: Trust in yourself and that the love you have for your little one will help you wing it! And always remember that if He brings you to it, He will bring you through it!

In case you’re wondering, I do love my son as much as I love my daughter. I realized I am capable of loving 2 different children in the same overflowing way. And with some juggling and guidance from God, somehow, we were able to raise 2 happy, sweet, and loving kids; and also afford paying daycare for 2 kids. We winged it!

Mom Lesson #4: It’s Okay To Get Yourself Something Nice

mom shopping for shoes - mom lessons

Mom getting herself a pair of shoes, something she has always wanted – one of the mom lessons every mom must learn

Before having kids, I have tons of extra money to spoil myself with anytime I want. But after having kids, I stopped getting myself anything because I would always feel guilty. With all the expenses that came with raising kids, including the high cost of daycare, and the fact that you need to get them new clothes every 3 months during their first year of life, it’s understandable to feel overwhelmed with all those. Good thing I was able to figure out a way to make my daughter’s clothes last longer (2 years).

I would always feel bad whenever I see something I want to get for myself. I couldn’t count the times I decided not to get something I need because I felt like the money spent on that would be better off saved for the kids just in case they’ll need something.

For the longest time, I’ve used  this blog as an excuse to get myself something. I would always convince myself that I need it because I will be using it for the blog. But then one day, it’s as if someone slapped me in the face with this mom lesson. And that’s when I started seeing things differently. With all the hard work I’ve done, the bad days I’ve had, and all those times my patience reached its limit, I deserve to get myself whatever it is I want to get.

So moms, it’s okay to get yourself something nice from to time. You should never feel bad or feel guilty about it. In fact, you absolutely deserve it. Consider it as a reward for all your hard work.

But being a mom, just like life, is all about that. You try what you think is best for your family, and if it didn't work out for the best, you move on, learn from it and improve the next time. - mom lessons

I hope that these 4 important mom lessons I learned after being a mom for 4 years would help you navigate motherhood with ease and confidenceI am absolutely not a motherhood expert and I certainly recognize the fact that I have so much to learn. But being a mom, just like life, is all about that. You try what you think is best for your family, and if it didn’t work out for the best, you move on, learn from it and improve the next time.

If you loved this post, don’t forget to pin it.

child holding flowers, mommy & daughter looking at each other with so much love in their eyes with text

What did you think of this post? What do you think is the most important mom lesson that you have learned after becoming a mom? Let me know in the comments. You know I always love to hear from you.

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Kisses, Belle - blog post signature

42 Comments
  • Danielle
    Posted at 09:10h, 17 July Reply

    Love these! Although I can’t relate, I’m close with a lot of moms and think this is so important to hear.

    xx, Danielle | http://www.pineappleandprosecco.com

    • Belle
      Posted at 13:38h, 31 July Reply

      Thanks Danielle!

  • Rach
    Posted at 09:39h, 17 July Reply

    Thank you for sharing this! Moms do so much and a lot of these are great reminders for all the moms out there!

    http://www.rdsobsessions.com

    • Belle
      Posted at 13:39h, 31 July Reply

      Thanks Rach!

  • ashley hargrove
    Posted at 11:14h, 17 July Reply

    Aw, this is such a great post! I wouldn’t be the person I am today without all of my mom’s hard work!

    • Belle
      Posted at 13:39h, 31 July Reply

      Thanks Ashley!

  • Brittany
    Posted at 13:19h, 17 July Reply

    Love this post!!! Such good lessons!!

    Brittany,
    http://www.lawyerlookbook.com

    • Belle
      Posted at 13:39h, 31 July Reply

      Thanks Brittany!

  • Rachel
    Posted at 13:40h, 17 July Reply

    Number two is SO important. Especially on the super hard days.

    • Belle
      Posted at 13:39h, 31 July Reply

      Absolutely!

  • Mollie
    Posted at 15:17h, 17 July Reply

    So many good lessons! Bookmarking this for when I’m ready to start a family!

    xx Mollie

    • Belle
      Posted at 13:39h, 31 July Reply

      Thanks Mollie!

  • Cathy
    Posted at 18:50h, 17 July Reply

    These are so true! Especially to forgive ourselves!

    XOXO
    Cathy

  • Leigh Suznovich
    Posted at 19:52h, 17 July Reply

    Thank you for sharing and being so real. This is a great read for moms!

    • Belle
      Posted at 13:39h, 31 July Reply

      Thanks Leigh!

  • Abbi
    Posted at 22:50h, 17 July Reply

    This is a beautiful post. I have to especially work on #1.

    • Belle
      Posted at 13:40h, 31 July Reply

      Thanks Abbi! You’re doing a great job! 😉

  • Laura @ Chaos & Quiet
    Posted at 23:01h, 17 July Reply

    These are all great, but I especially love #2. We’re so hard on ourselves, it’s easy to forget that to them we are perfect.

    • Belle
      Posted at 13:40h, 31 July Reply

      Thanks Laura! That is so true! It doesn’t matter what we think of ourselves because we can be hard on ourselves most of the time… what’s important is that in their eyes, we are perfect! 🙂

  • Marcie
    Posted at 23:59h, 17 July Reply

    I’m glad you mentioned about getting yourself something nice! I’m always sacrificing to give my kids everything. It’s hard to be selfish for a moment to treat yourself!

    • Belle
      Posted at 13:41h, 31 July Reply

      That is so true! It’s hard because I always feel guilty too. But we have to remember, that we deserve it too!

  • Jessica
    Posted at 01:51h, 18 July Reply

    This really hit home for me today. I felt like a complete Mom failure. Thank you.

    • Belle
      Posted at 13:41h, 31 July Reply

      I’m glad it helped Jessica. And no, you’re not a mom failure! You’re doing AMAZING! 🙂

  • Laura Leigh
    Posted at 14:17h, 18 July Reply

    Pinning for the future! Thanks for sharing lady!

    xo Laura Leigh
    http://www.louellareese.com

    • Belle
      Posted at 13:41h, 31 July Reply

      Thanks Laura!

  • Stephanie
    Posted at 15:44h, 18 July Reply

    I’m not a mom – yet – but these are good reminders even now! Plus, I’m an aunt, so I can always apply them in some way for that! This is great!

    • Belle
      Posted at 13:42h, 31 July Reply

      Thanks Stephanie!

  • Anna English
    Posted at 21:33h, 18 July Reply

    I’m not a mom YET, but appreciate you sharing these!

    • Belle
      Posted at 13:42h, 31 July Reply

      Thanks Anna!

  • April Kusewicz
    Posted at 00:10h, 19 July Reply

    This is a great read Belle. Thank you so sharing your thoughts…very nice.

    • Belle
      Posted at 13:42h, 31 July Reply

      Thanks April!

  • Goldfields Girl
    Posted at 02:27h, 19 July Reply

    Some great tips. Parenting is hard and we need to go easy on ourselves. X

    Deneale | Goldfields Girl

    http://www.goldfieldsgirl.com

    • Belle
      Posted at 13:42h, 31 July Reply

      Absolutely true!

  • Avani
    Posted at 13:16h, 20 July Reply

    Such an amazing article! Thanks for sharing

    • Belle
      Posted at 13:42h, 31 July Reply

      Thanks Avani!

  • Jannine MacKinnon
    Posted at 10:47h, 02 August Reply

    Great lessons. I’ve been going through many of these myself as a first time mom.

    Xo Jannine | http://www.happystylishfit.com

    • Belle
      Posted at 09:33h, 16 August Reply

      Glad you liked them!

  • Lydia
    Posted at 17:59h, 08 August Reply

    I absolutely love this post so much! There is so much I can relate to! And my daughter and this next little girl I’m having this December will be 11 months apart so this something I needed to read! I worry about spreading the love evenly so much!!

    XO https://www.lydialouise.com/summer-fall-transition-outfit/

    • Belle
      Posted at 09:39h, 16 August Reply

      Thanks Lydia! Don’t worry about it. Spreading the love will come naturally! 🙂

  • Jealeyni
    Posted at 22:51h, 16 August Reply

    OMG, I needed this right now #thestruggleisreal. Thank you for sharing this. It’s good to know, I am not alone.

    • Belle
      Posted at 13:29h, 22 August Reply

      I’m glad that this somehow helped you! You are definitely not alone!

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